The Makings of a Better Me

Okay, I am officially back to writing on here because I have come to believe that if I don't use it I will lose it and my mind is something that I cannot afford to lose right now in this life. My creativity with my words is my release therapy and I know that I have plenty to say. Whether I have been too busy to write anything or too lazy, I'm not really sure, since the excuses seem to change daily.

I finally got to go home for the holidays a couple months ago for the first time in 4 years. Yeah I know, that's a long time, but I had my reasons, or shall I say obstacles. I know one thing is for sure, the more things change the more they do stay the same. It was great to hang out with my old friends, run into those I particularly didn't want to see, and hope to catch up with the few I missed on the next go around in April. It was great to see that the things that made us all familiar with one another were still intact, but on the other hand it was good to reacquaint ourselves as much older and wiser people where a lot of the childish bs that we had to endure had been diminished to nothingness.

There comes a point that we should all reach in our lives where there is some piece of change that makes us better than we were 10 minutes ago. Hell I'm not perfect and will never claim to be. A health scare last week changed a fragment of me in just that instant. How can one go into the hospital for one thing and find out there may be something totally unrelated going on? During the multiple blood tests, cat scans and MRI's my short life seemed to pass before my eyes and I realized that I had so many more things that I wanted to do. Something that many people never have the chance to experience. We spend a lot of life wasting it on past issues and miniscule behavior, but it shouldn't take a health scare, natural disaster, or a war for us to realize that we can change and make better decisions for ourselves. I have decided to take control of the things around me and block all that negative energy that might have clouded my senses in the first place. I want there to be a purpose for which I am, and what I do in this lifetime because we all have that purpose. If I can try and be the best person I can be, maybe it'll rub off on someone else close to me, and then someone close to them, and so on.

Just pay it forward.


Peace